Insights
I write to practice curiosity about the maps we inherit. Unexamined, they run our relationships and our lives unconsciously. Examined, they allow us to live authentically, a life that’s ours, not borrowed.
Chapter 6: When Maps Collide
"The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are…
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The Unexamined Map is Not Worth Living
Johannes Kepler arrived in Prague in February 1600 to work as an assistant to Tycho Brahe. Brahe was the most precise observational astronomer in Europe. For thirty years he had measured the positions of stars and planets to an accuracy nobody else had achieved. He had spent a fortune building instruments. He had filled volumes with data. And he had a perspective. He was certain, but he was wrong. Brahe believed the Earth sat at the center, the moon and sun orbited the Earth, and the other planets orbited the sun. It was a hybrid system. He had inherited part of it from Aristotle and Ptolemy.
You Left the Church, The Altar Came With You.
SEP 14 · Substack
The Brain & The Devil You Know
SEP 11 · Substack
There Are No Rules, Only Love
SEP 2 · Substack
No, Your Ex Is Not a Narcissist
AUG 31 · Substack
Gottman, EFT, and Structured Intensives: What Each One Is Actually Built to Do
AUG 29 · Couple Forward Blog
Is Couples Therapy Worth It? An Honest Answer, Including When It Isn't
AUG 29 · Couple Forward Blog
No, Your Partner Is Not a Narcissist
AUG 29 · Couple Forward Blog
The AI Revolution Is Here and We Don’t Get It
AUG 28 · Substack
The Hidden Layer Between Us
AUG 19 · Substack
Life is one long adjustment disorder
AUG 18 · Substack
To Each According to Their Leverage
AUG 14 · Substack
The Self-Help Industry Was Built by a Man Running From the Police
AUG 13 · Substack
Spock Was Never Logical
JUL 28 · Substack
Your Relationship Problems Live in Your Body. Here's What That Actually Means.
MAY 9 · Couple Forward Blog
The Research Underneath the Method
MAY 9 · Research
You Did Couples Therapy and the Pattern Came Back. Here's Why.
MAY 8 · Couple Forward Blog
Atone, Attune, Attach: The Sequence Most Couples Skip
MAY 8 · Research
Knowing Your Attachment Style Is Not the Same as Changing Your Relationship. Here's What's Missing.
MAY 7 · Couple Forward Blog
He Hasn't Stopped Trying. He Stopped Believing That Trying Would Register.
MAY 6 · Couple Forward Blog
The Neuroscience of Identity Change
MAY 6 · Research
Looking for 2071
MAY 5 · Substack
Rebuilding Trust After an Affair Is Not About Forgiveness. It's About Rewiring the Loop That Made Betrayal Possible.
MAY 5 · Couple Forward Blog
Their Defensiveness Isn't About What You Said. It's About What They Heard.
MAY 4 · Couple Forward Blog
The Six-Year Wait
MAY 4 · Research
Is It Too Late? How to Tell the Difference Between a Dead Marriage and a Frozen One
MAY 3 · Couple Forward Blog
Why Insight Doesn't Translate Under Pressure
MAY 2 · Research
Differentiation Outlasts Communication
APR 30 · Research
When Separation Is the Intervention
APR 28 · Research
The Brake System You Forgot to Address
APR 26 · Research
The Ending That Comes Before the Beginning
APR 24 · Research
Why You Keep Having the Same Fight, and What It's Actually About
APR 4 · Couple Forward Blog
